Leftovers

At this point, Thanksgiving 2010 is a distant memory and we’re all preparing for Christmas. I need to get rid of some of these “leftovers” to make room for new foolishness. Even though it’s a couple of weeks away, I KNOW the time that I spend at home will enable me to stockpile so much more. 

 

So these “leftovers” were ones I jotted down in various places that I guess didn’t fit into any of my previous posts. Mangez!

 

1) Keyshia Cole is no Mary J. Blige. Please stop with the comparisons. She’s not a young Mary, she’s not the new Mary, SHE’S NOT MARY!! I like her, but she just ain’t. QUIT IT!!

 

2) I love shoes. Way more than clothes. Black, blue, fat, skinny, short, tall, I love ’em all. For my high school prom, I bought the shoes first and found the dress later. When I get married, I will likely do the same. When I was younger, I had a pretty mean shoe game.  I was in Macy’s a few days ago trying to figure out what happened to my shoe game…..I think a mortgage and some student loans may have happened to my shoe game….

 

3)  I don’t/can’t/tried but couldn’t dig chick sports. Me watching a girl do any sport besides run track doesn’t seem natural. Yep. I’m a Vol. And I know the Lady Vols are like world basketball champs every year and Pat Summit is THAT DUDE, but I just can’t get down with it. Somebody walked up to me on the street one day and tried to give me some free Mystics tickets. I may have turned around and run in the other direction….

 

4) If you must take your wedding band off at the gym, please try to remember to NOT leave it there. Not everyone will be as honest as me when they find it….

 

5)  I like my blue cheese dressing with a little bit of salad in it. I was disgusted to learn that Nordstrom Café does not serve blue cheese dressing. Don’t think I’ve shopped at Nordstrom’s since.

 

6) I love noses and lips….specifically, full noses and even fuller lips (a la Derek Luke). I think they are beautiful. I like to look at people’s noses and lips and facial structures when I talk to them (so if you’ve ever found me staring at you, and not really listening to you, now you know why). Over the years, I have grown to see the beauty in more distinct features, and not just because I have them (wink, wink) but because they are…..simply beautiful.

 

Sorry….I’m starting to feel deep and serious now….so let me get back on track….

 

7) If at all possible, please try to keep your Aston Martin from getting repossessed. It is not a good look.

 

8)  And speaking of cars, don’t put bumper stickers on yours. Trust me, you REALLY don’t care about the issue that much. I promise you don’t.

 

9)  When you’re on the phone with someone in a different city and you’re trying to tell them about something on TV, please tell them what NETWORK to turn to and not what NUMBER. The likelihood of y’alls channels being the same is low.

 

10) This waterproof mascara REALLY IS waterproof.

 

 

Random thought:

I still think Basketball Wives is funner than Football Wives.

 

Deep thought:

“Even if happiness forgets you a little bit, never completely forget about it.”—Jacques Prévert

Advertisements

About Magnet for Foolishness

Resident of the DMV…and my incessant thoughts. Always hungry. Comedy craver. Ice cream freak. Reality TV show junkie. Slightly opinionated. Rarely wrong. Part Lisa Simpson. Part Sue Sylvester. Part Meredith Grey. Renowned chef and baker…avid gardener…pet lover…sometimes liar. Effortlessly forgetful. Always hungry. Blindly hopeful. Easily embarrassed (NOT). Eerily observant. Searching for something. Disregarding parallelism. Chronically tardy. Ruthlessly impatient. Surprisingly affectionate. Unnecessarily long-winded.
This entry was posted in Comedy, culture, Fashion, Funny, humor, Life, Life plans, movies, music, Personal, pop culture, random, Relationships, television, thoughts, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

I want to hear from you!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s